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sernacht:

So, I was in the car today and saw someone with the license plate “X0DUS3 5”, so I thought it was like Exodus 3:5 and I looked it up, and do you know what it said?

"Do not come any closer."

sorelatable:

THIS TYPE OF ICE IS THE BEST TYPE OF ICE

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reverseracist:

my pussy: 💯
her pussy: make bread rise

raavenclaws:

When someone you hate gets dragged and ur like

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evaot:

when ur tryin to tell a story but people talk over you

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deverse:

my mom meant to post a picture of her dog and posted a picture of a turkey insteadimage

very nsfw only read this if u want to have an orgasm

helioscentrifuge:

zeldasbooty:

nakud woman (with boob) 

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glowcloud:

I have to say the Kim k app was an amazing business idea and I feel like it has already done wonders for her brand. Now I see pictures of Kim kardashian and I think “that’s my extremely generous friend Kim she really got my modeling career off the ground”

thank u tumbl for not being nsfw when my dad walked in thank u than k u

ignitionremix:

it’s a beautiful day to give me money

tylerchokely:

please watch this

chapmen:

a modern hero

#vid 

no-wifi:

why isn’t there a dollar bill eyes emoji?